The Pretense of Remaining As We Were
by Umbrella-ella
Summary: In which Abigail Griffin and Marcus Kane fall in love and fall apart (sometimes). But it always begins with the two of them. [A collection of one-shots and drabbles centered around Kane and Abby.]


**A/N: This is also posted on AO3 under my account there. I fell in love with this pairing from the very first moment, and I wanted to write something for them. Contains references to 2x16 (which I've only seen clips of). Kane and Abby are my favorites, and I wanted to show off my shiny new affection for them.**

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Something's shifted, changed between the two of them since Mount Weather, and even as they make the long journey back, they're never far from one another, not really.

Marcus is never far from her, and she can feel him there, just outside the edge of her vision. It's in the frequent looks he casts her way, when he thinks she's not looking, in the prickle of her skin and the brush of his fingers against her arm as he keeps up with her, his steps steady, the occasional branch snapping beneath his boots.

Sunlight filters through the trees, and the breeze is almost too cold, but Abby pulls her sweater close, the one that smells of him, and lets her eyes close. She'd almost lost this, almost lost the feeling of warm sun on her skin, of the breeze fluttering through the leaves, and of Marcus, the feeling of him near her, his warm smile steady as he looks down at her, exhaustion rimming his eyes. When they stop to camp for the night, it's chilly, and she shudders in the night air, even as the sweater is drawn closer still, bundling around her shoulders and bunching over her stomach.

They won't let her walk anywhere, which is to be expected, but years of being a doctor make her a terrible patient, so when they offer her a blanket, she refuses, insisting that someone else in greater need gets it. Abby pretends not to notice as Marcus shifts closer to her, his own body heat warming the air between them, and he's mere inches away.

The firelight catches in his eyes as she looks up, and she wishes she could look away, because what she sees is surely not meant for her, no, it's a private emotion, a private thought, but she cannot help but remain there, staring unabashedly. In some moment, in some minute fraction of time, it shifts, and all of the moments before where neither of them could look away— they mean something else now. His eyes are dark, but kind, pupils blown wide in the dark, and Abby sees something she's always seen, but she _sees it now_. She thinks she understands.

But it does not matter. So she smiles and pulls her gaze away, focusing intently on the crackling flame in front of her. He's still looking, she knows, and she knows what it means.

It's only when the hum of the forest in the night becomes too loud and the flames are dampened and their meager meal is finished that they turn in for the night, and even as Abby lets her heavy eyelids drift shut, she realizes Marcus has laid out his own blanket next to her.

When, finally, they've finished the long trek through the forest to Camp Jaha, he takes her hand and smiles down at her.

 _We're home_ , Abby thinks, and relishes the feel of his rough fingers wrapped around her hand, soft where his grip could be harsh, and she doesn't want to let go. She finds herself almost reaching for his hand when his fingers slip from hers.

The air is crisp and the leaves are turning when she finally is cleared to walk around by herself, and she and Marcus have barely spoken, barely held a conversation, and Abby briefly wonders if he is angry at her. They speak for mere minutes at a time, and he will be silent, and then there's that look. The one that says everything she's afraid of. It's a reminder, a constant thrum of reassurance deep in her bones, it's a risk, and maybe she should take it. _I'm here._

The clouds are dark and angry above them, and the sun is slipping below the horizon, the last rays of white glimmering just over the mountainside when he says it. The patter of rain is steady on the side of the canvas tent as he sits next to her, booted toe dragging through the quickly muddying ground.

"I thought I was going to lose you." His voice is craggy, broken, and Abby wants more than anything to hold him. Marcus takes a sharp breath and Abby wonders if he thinks he's said too much. The words themselves are said on a puff of air, and Abby thinks at first, that she's heard wrong. He's staring at her again.

The _something_ his eyes is back again, and there's no looking away, there's no mistaking it, and she can't pretend it's not there because his dark eyes are so full of hope, so heavy that it sends a rush of air rushing from her lungs and Abby can't catch her breath because _by God, he's beautiful,_ despite the dark circles beneath his eyes, and the way his dark lashes are too dark against pale skin— It's okay, she thinks, this here, now.

Marcus' eyes widen a fraction as she slips her hand in his, drawing comfort from the warmth of his palm. This feeling is familiar, they've done it before, but it's different now.

"I'm here, Marcus."

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 **I hope you enjoyed it! Let me know in a review!**


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